Tales From The Crypt II

(album: Buried Alive - 2021)

This right here is how I kick off the album
I don't really care about the outcome
I just wanna tell a couple stories and prove to everybody
That I'm more than you think about me times a thousand
I spent the last year looking back on my accomplishments
Ignoring all the compliments, I don't ever really talk about 'em
'Cause the second that I do, one of you is gonna choose
To ruin my mood and bring me down some
I can never get a glimpse of happiness 'cause every time it happens
I'll just think about the accidents that might come
People on the internet remind me that I ain't shit
And I agree with them, but I pretend that I doubt 'em
I remember backstage, back in Omaha
Matt told me stop making rap records all about 'em
But it's hard, because a part of me doesn't even want a part of this shit
But the other part wants all of it, I'm in the middle like Malcolm
How come every time I open my feed
There's so many comments filled with positivity
But there's seconds of it negative, it's inevitable
That, in my head, all the positive has been outdone
If you dealt with the hatred I get on a day-to-day basis
I promise you wouldn't make it, so don't even try
The only person that should hate me is myself, and I do
But you? I've never even given you a reason why
And more times than not, I lay in bed and I sigh
Thinking what it would be like if I would've died
That's the time you see me hop on the Instagram Live
And chat with you guys, running away from my mind
Somebody says some dumb shit to get under my skin
Then I circle back around to where my night begins
And I'm trapped with my thoughts to bring my life to an end
I saw a therapist back in college and he didn't do shit
All my life is like "Ring Around the Rosie"
Spinning in circles, burning to ashes slowly
Writing my hurt down in a verse before it gets worse
And I have to book a fucking hearse to hold me
And these albums are where I let it all hang out
And show my scars for all to play loud
My mom didn't even know I tried to kill myself
Until I put "Tales from the Crypt" out
I remember writing some of those tracks I couldn't even record
In the studio with Joey, crying like a baby boy
All the scars are real, and all the stories are facts
So if you listen, you'll see I'm way more than fast rap
That's why it affects me bad and I get real mad
When these people tell me that only I rap real fast
Or I copy this or I copy that
Or I sound like him or I sound like that
'Cause I pull it all out, deep from inside
Back from the depths of my dark, black mind
Each track that I decide to write
Shaves off a couple good years of my life
I debated on dropping this or not, I can't lie
'Cause no matter what, it's gonna be an uphill climb
'Cause before you even click, you got a thought of what this is
And every time I do that thought, you're gonna box me in
I got the stigma of a fast white rapper
'Cause I'm white and I rap fast
But why can't I just rap how I like and you listen
Without labeling my craft?
'Cause I do rap fast, but I also rap slow
For Christ's sake, I've shown you part of my soul
"I'm Not Okay", "Night In September", "The End"
These are examples of my holes
These are the parts of my soul that I wrote
And took from my dome and spoke so you can relate back home
These are the locks of my brain that I broke
And dove into so you can know what I know
And this album is more of that
I've got so many stories that have been untapped
So sit back, and listen up and buckle up for the ride
This is Tales From the Crypt of how I'm buried alive