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Cryptic Wisdom

7 Years

 

7 Years


Once I was seven years old
My father told me
I'll never leave again, you won't be lonely
Once I was seven years old

I was a kid, I was seven
Never knew you or knew where you had been
What was the pen, too innocent?
Nothing you said was making any sense
I was like damn, who is this man?
Standing before me saying take a chance
Suddenly everything I thought I knew about the world
Was taken when I shook his hand
I was so mad, didn't know why
Why was my name all tatted on your side?
Why did you mess with the bliss over me and my sister
We're cool without you, doing fine
We came around, you came around
Told us that you would never ever leave
Heart on my sleeve, letting it bleed
Waiting for you again 'cause I believed

Once I was eleven years old
My mama told me
I won't do this again, need you to go please
Once I was eleven years old

I wasn't there, I didn't care
Moving around a lot and couldn't bare
Everyone wanted to fix it and took me away
From my sister to live on a prayer
Breaking the law, getting expelled
Didn't believe in nothing, you could tell
Wanted to fail, gunning for jail
Wanted to kill my father in his cell
I was a mess, that I confess
Too young to bottle this up in my chest
Too young to do what I was doing
Who knew that I would've been a little bit depressed
Got into blow, got into dope
Made an investment with nothing to show
It was the only thing I had control of
When it was all over it never would go

Once I was twenty years old
My father wrote me
Son, I'm sorry that you never got to know me
Once I was twenty years old

I didn't know then, and I don't know now
Why it was hard for me to write it down
Why it was easier to say out loud
And whenever I try to write I'd feel a cloud
Sooner or later I gave it up
One way or another, can't say enough
When I met my brother and told him
I wanted to hear from you, that was a major bluff
I was right in the middle of using, abusing and losing myself
I knew not of sobriety
I wasn't ready to meet him
I didn't feel like I could be a role model entirely
But inside of me I was like, damn I relate
And I thought I could be of some help
And it didn't dawn on me
I couldn't be somebody's light if I don't love myself

But soon I'll be sixty years old
And will I still hold on
To everything that happened and be so cold?
Soon I'll be sixty years old
Soon I'll be sixty years old

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