Pressure

(album: Marbled - 2018)

I feel pressure
Oooh baby I'm a headcase
You can see it on my face yeah
And I'm walking round with deadweight, uh
I got goose egg
Walk with nothing but a loose leg
You can see it in my posture
You might see in the newsspread, uh
'Bout the older days
I feel the bone chip off my shoulder blades
As I wait for the world

The weight of the world
Keeps my head from ever staying sober, hey
But as the pressure refines
I'm like a dark black coal about to turn to a diamond
My sobriety is waiting for the better days
I know that heaven waits for me to wake up
And fly back home to Neverland

I thought I'd
Take a minute just to figure it out
Many minutes gone still flipping the style
They throwing shade like the more you shine the bigger the cloud
Living in lyric well if only I had written it down
Sipping the liquor and thinking bigger than many men
50 cent before Eminem
Another gem in the sediment
Only scared of irrelevance, well
I guess it's looking imminent now
To run the world while it's spinning around
I write my life like its revelations
A saint, ignoring the temptations
Some diving in while I, sit on the fence waiting
Not the type to frame my ribbon for tenth place
Then, sit here waiting for the next race it's basic
Don't know what fashion is
Was never a gymnastic kid
But I'll bend over backwards just to find out who I am again
Had to move away just to get closer with my fam again
Funny how the pressure makes the man a gem

Don't wanna be stuck here living in a routine
Just writing my woes in a looseleaf
Trying new things with the crew
See, we've been kicking it for so long Bruce Lee
My gramps had the right state of mind
He was right behind me in '99
Now that he's ghosting, I'ma make his legacy ring loud till I'm oldie

I had a doubt or two, energy is slipping off that Mountain Dew
Found my enemy inside addiction, made that mountain move
Houses moved since April '93, I had a Cloudy mood
'Til I found that soul that I'm arousing to only one
Questions I had asked about existence never outted truth
Thought maybe I should settle down and clean it like them spouses do
But in this day and age of modern media consumption
I'm a sour dude
When I lay awake inside the coffin will my flowers move?
There's two sides to this confession
Feel the pressure in my blood from waiting fans, complacent misdirection
Graduated with a knowledge in essays
Still can't figure out if I'm dead inside or dead weight, here, here
Listen up with clear ears
Many nights are filled with tears, but plenty times I've commandeered myself
I'm dear to love the one that keeps me grounded near myself
So I don't float too far down rabbit holes, here

Window's locked in this
Welcome to my
Welcome to my
Welcome to my (marbled)