Lie

(album: Anything Goes - 2008)

Well, I've been swinging through these swinging doors for, aww,
going on probably about 9 years now, maybe even 10
And I watch old Joe at the end of the bar with another hot woman
on his one good arm and they walk out for a while and he comes back in smiling, again
So I finally had to ask old Joe,
“Man, what's your secret to success, your power of persuasion over the opposite sex”
And he says, “Son, well, honestly, it's pretty simple.”
He said, “I just kinda walk up and buy her a drink and open up my mouth and…

Lie I tell her I'm a movie star
I just flew into town to buy this bar
I'm only here tonight, that's right
I gotta go, yeah, we're filming on location down in Mexico
Would you believe that I got the leading role?
That's right, honey, I beat out a lot of folks that you'd probably know.”
Oh, a man has got to do what a man's gotta do
Anything it takes to make her think you're cool
Ah, you got nothing to lose, so go on and try
Just walk right up and smile and look her dead in the eye
And lie
That's right lie
So I tried and tried a couple weekends and
it was like strike 1, strike 2, strike out again
But I narrowed it down, and I scratched it out, and I came up with something
that without a doubt I knew, I was gonna make old Joe proud
And I go up and I'd say
Hi Honey, whatcha doing for the rest of your life
I've been waiting such a long, long time
And you know what honey?
Meeting you here, man, it just really feels like fate
Oh I, I bet you didn't see me as a marrying type
Let's take it slow I don't just want one night, oh no darling
If you're looking for that you might as well look somewhere else
Well, because I'm just not that kind of guy

And
kids, oh I love kids
Dogs, in-laws, and a piece of land
Dirty diapers in my mini van
Aw man, I can hardly wait

Oh a man has got to do what a man's gotta do
Anything it takes to make her think you're cool
Aw, you got nothing to lose so go on and try
Just walk right up, and smile, and look her dead in the eye
You know what you got to do, lie
That's right you gotta lie
Sometimes you gotta lie