Boots Like Emmy Lou's

(album: God & The FBI - 2000)

If I had boots like Emmy Lou's, I'd be a country star
Rhinestones on my BVD's, and a Hummingbird guitar
I'd buy myself the biggest bus that ever graced the track
With a loveseat for the two of us, and a swimming pool in back

If I had boots like Emmy Lou's
I'd wear my hair like Loretta used to do
I'd sing like Patsy Cline
And Kitty Wells combined
If I had boots like Emmy Lou's
I'd never need a shine

If I had boots like Emmy Lou's, I'd be so very rich
I'd hire a dog to scratch me every time I got an itch
I'd buy a thousand Cadallics, with longhorns on the front
Drive one 'til the ashtray filled, then haul it to the dump

If I had boots like Emmy Lou's
I'd wear my hair like Loretta used to do
I'd sing like Patsy Cline
And Kitty Wells combined
If I had boots like Emmy Lou's
I'd never need a shine

I'd buy my clothes from Nudie
Have fingernails like Tammy
Tease my hair like Dolly
And measure ten feet tall
I'd teach those boots to talk
They'd lecture in New Yawk
If I had boots like Emmy Lou's
I'd never need to walk

If I had boots like Emmy Lou's, I'd die without a care
Fly straight up to heaven's gate and shove my way in there
And when Saint Peter asked me what I'd done to be so bold
I'd point down to my boots and say "They're recently re-soled"

So fit me for a robe, wings and halo too
But I cannot stay if you take away my boots like Emmy Lou's
No I cannot stay if you take away my boots like Emmy Lou's

If I had boots like Emmy Lou's
I'd wear my hair like Loretta used to do
I'd sing like Patsy Cline
And Kitty Wells combined
If I had boots like Emmy Lou's
I'd never need a shine