I've Changed

(album: Todd Smith - 2006)

Just staring at these four walls closing
In on me, feeling like time's frozen
Fading in and out, nodding and dozing
Guilt tearing up my brain like erosion
What I did to you was wrong I admit it
I regret that I did it like a junkie when he's jonzin
All alone in what used to be a home
But you packed up our joy in that bag you put your clothes in
The voicemail that you left me was scolding
Hot enough to burn a hole in a cauldron
Cause it was all true, that's why we all through
Now your girl's picking up the cell when I call you
Talking slick like she ain't here
She don't want you no more, punk disappear click
I need to hit her with a brick
But that'll only lead me to a worse predicament
I hope your girlfriend ain't got you on a liquor binge
With her bitter attitude just cause she's sick of men
But I'ma keep on calling, fighting 'til the end
On my knees 'til they bleed, to prove my love again

[Ryan Toby:]
I sit in front of yo' crib in the pouring rain
Whylin out screaming yo' name
And keeping ringing yo' bell 'til you mad as hell
And call the po'-po', I ain't afraid (yeah, yeah)
You can get yo' folks and yo' cousins and them
And try to run me off yo' blocka (uh-huh)
But I ain't scared, I ain't going nowhere
And I ain't stopping 'til I gotcha
To show you I changed shorty

I seen you at the movies with some tall cat
So I bust his headlights with a ball bat
When I was with you he would give me dap and all that
Now you in his arms in the mall, what you call that?
That's what I get for creeping and crawling
Every other weekend gone until the morning
Sneaking out to my dirt, dead wrong
Coming back past dawn with the guilty mask on
And I never counted the cost, took heed to warnings
Try to hurt a rose you get pricked by a thorn
And it don't feel nice, when you wake up nights
Shaking in cold sweats and your whole life's a wreck
That was the old me, the one I still regret
The one you couldn't respect, the one you should forget
But I'ma keep on calling, fighting 'til the end
On my knees 'til they bleed, to prove my love again

To show you I changed shorty
I really did change shorty (I'm telling you I've changed)
I wanna show you I changed shorty
(I still love you!)

I don't care if the cops got me surrounded
SWAT teams whatever, tell 'em to send the hounds in
My mind's in an altered state
Like I'm headed for a wall, top speed, foot off the brake
I make a fool of myself, girl whatever it takes
I already played the fool when I let you escape
You're as, good as it gets, your friendship your sex
Everything about you and yours connects
From your, beautiful smile to the scent of your skin
The sheets smell different, this is not living
It feels like dying, God knows I'm trying
Ain't no sight sadder than a grown man crying
Please find it in your heart to forgive me
Realize only God can convict me
We all make mistakes, so have you
If God show mercy on me, then you should too

To show you I changed shorty
I really did change shorty (I'm telling you I've changed)
I wanna show you I changed shorty
(I still love you!) ow!
(I'm telling you I've changed)