Hipster Hunter

(album: Apple Tummy - 2009)

BROOKLYN!!!!

I was out in Brooklyn let it be known
2005 the water front was the zone
That's when I arrived I was fresh off the boat
The isle was ATL and it was swell to be home
Couldn't go to Queens, greek priests look like sith
Couldn't go to Bronx cause that's where the real rappers live
Couldn't live in Jersey cause some ex's wanna hurt me
Couldn't happen in Manhattan cause I'm just a fan like fergie
So even though it really hurt I went ahead with Billy Burke
And it was so convenient the break seemed like this could really work
then I started counting jerks found them out was quite a stir
had to get Excel just to tell how many that there were
Easy to identify I learned how to hunt them
Missing from the crib and first to flame them and I dumped them
Know what I say fuck them a defensively fashioned function
you think that they'd be fun but that's a dumb assumption

Party's nonstop til cops come a knocking til bodies start bobbing
I'm the hipster hunter
Prescription pill popping, collective cock blocking, I'm dead d-bag droppin
I'm the hipster hunter
[x2]

Cause they're borderline squatters, peg legged bastards
Jeans so tight make your balls say the password
My point is these is pirates and they all got bands
They got really cute girlfriend's all I got's my hand
You don't even understand how I can mock a motley crew
I prefer a park with cynics a park with Polish prostitutes
I prefer piano why because their sound is really sad
No one seems to noticed monsters rarely have to make these bands
I detect your defects are in need for respect
And Mr. boogie nights with the very hairy v neck
Hey asshole wearing scary specs like you are Tom Daschle
hang you off a roof make you hum Crystal Castles
It's invite only to my gallery show
Then I turn on the gas cause they all gotta goooo
you cut coke like it's class you beg for a bus pass
Rock the Rachel Ray scarf and Glenn Frey's moustache

Party's nonstop til cops come a knocking til bodies start bobbing
I'm the hipster hunter
Prescription pill popping collective cock blocking I'm dead d-bag droppin
I'm the hipster hunter
[x2]

I'm the hipster hunter
[x4]