Lord Of The Fries

(album: Indie Rocket Science - 2011)

Happy Meals for breakfast
Happy Meals for lunch
Happy Meals for dinner
You could say I'm feeling pretty happy

Fast food I love, eat it all the time
On the go, makes me feel fine
Big Mac Lunch and you see I'm
Saving my pennies towards nickels and dimes
For the drive-thru, getting fed
Because the media messes with my head
Since I was 5 I learned to snack
TV taught me to be fat
Ronald Grimace, Major McCheese
The HamBurgler, were all friends to me
They bombard kids with advertising
Happy Meals, keep the kids smiling
Where? At school and in the home
In math problems schools condone
(One quarter pounder plus another equals what?)
Sickness, death and a giant butt!
Cokes and Snickers in the fridge
High fructose corn syrup, that's how I live
Diabetes, I got it, but I've recently found
These extra pounds, they drag me down!
Somehow survived, synthesized dyes
Artificial flavors and Yellow #5
So much Bovine Growth Hormone
That the FDA just condemned my home!

Yo, are you gonna finish that?
Food can fill your spiritual emptiness
In America we have the freedom of choice
And I choose to be fat
You can't take that away from me
These civil liberties are deep fried baby!

Pizza, pasta, chocolate and ice cream
(Ahhhhhhh)
Pizza, pasta, chocolate and ice cream
(Ahhhhhhh)

Addiction, welcome to CrackDonald's
Getting my fix from my dealer Ronald
If you are what you eat, and you eat what you are
I'm as fat as a cow, I can't fit in my car
I'm no monster don't dismiss this
I love animals they're delicious
Forget the cruel ways KFC's preparing them
Organic food is awfully un-American
Now I'm 40, did I mention
The heart attacks from the hypertension
And munching baked pies with all the guys
Folks call me Lord of the Fries
My body's a prison given my strokes
One aneurysm no joke
2 billion sold OK that's fine
But everytime I leave they update the sign
Folks run and hide when I come to dine
Cause everytime I step in line
They burn the rainforest so cows can feast
Causing global warming to increase
The methane gas from their behinds
Absorbs the heat
Carbon dioxide gets trapped
In fact it's really quite scary
Chocolate, vanilla, mmm strawberry!

Pizza, pasta, chocolate and ice cream
(Ahhhhhhh)
Pizza, pasta, chocolate and ice cream
(Ahhhhhhh)

This is not a political statement
This is life wisdom
If you eat junk food all the time
You're not gonna feel as good
As if you eat nutitional foods
I'm just saying
That's the point of this song