Castlevania

(album: Super Cool Tree House - 2021)

See, I just pop in from time to time to remind you I'm better
See, you don't wanna hang around a trap too long when it feels like a set-up
Yeah, everybody's on the edge, but the mask look sharp like Shredder
All I do is rap about rap, yeah, the shit's so meta

Okay, now when I was still a kid (Yeah), they gave me a job at a dealership (Ayy)
Now, I don't know shit about cars, but I played Castlevania, bitch, I could really whip, yeah (Vroom)
The boss said that I should be diligent, start from the bottom and just get the feel of it
I spent the summer just feeling sick, handing out flyers, and wearing this giant gorilla head
I should have really quit, told him I thought it was made from asbestos
He told me it's best to just deal with it, told me to scare little kids and just growl at 'em
Basically told me to chill in it (Rargh), he told me that I was a gun, but he fired me
I ricocheted back entirely, shot through the window and killed the prick
Dead in a wheelie bin, man, I'm so villainous, cooler than the other side of a pillow mint
Got an 8-ball in my pocket like billiards, got a new job killing off my affiliates (Yeah, yeah, yeah)
I got a bunch of detectives all baffled in front of a map with a hundred thumb tacks in it
Bumping my rap sheet to study the patterns to figure how long till I kill again (Huh?)

Pshh, just stop, you ain't got bars strong enough
I got all the keys, try lock me up, I'm a killer free when I'm off the cuff (Okay)
Fuck cops, go and pick another bottle up
Got 'em pouring whisky in their coffee cups: mug shots
All you rappers too subpar (Yes), I oughta smash you like stunt cars (Right)
[?] a golden axe in my glove box (Okay), nah, I'm talking smack, call the drug squad (Oh)
But this whole field is my front yard (Right), bruh, I'm the Victa, you're cut grass (Good)
See the shiv working like shift work, I put holes in you like punch cards

Phew, man, I talk a lot of hate
Maybe I should guzzle paint, yeah, get some colour on my face, yeah
I been stuck inside all day, but tell my mama that I'm great, yeah
All I wanna do is Win Ma, but Little Nicky's not a Saint (Yeah, yeah, yeah)
I been lonely through the winter, maybe we could have a date? (Date)
I could call ya? I could ring ya? I could pick you up at eight? Yeah (Okay)
We can eat a bunch of popcorn while we watch a couple rom-coms
Start a fire, put some logs on, then get inside ya like a Tauntaun

Jon Snow with a crossbow in a poncho hunting for a cheap meal in a Costco
Oh my God mode, 'bout to hit 'em with a combo, but I got no time for ya, 'cause my watch broke
On my wrist, I should get it fixed, but I'm not though, said it's 4:20 all the... wait
4:20 all the time if you want smoke, 24/7 try to lie, but the clock don't
Said I'm normally kinda blunt, better not choke, get a bong ready, got a lot for the chop bowl
Man, I already put the pot in the pot roast, never talk to me like a bud when you're not dope
Haven't bought any? Smoke a cock to the cockroach, I'ma scorch every joint I got into charcoal
Don't, don't bug me, I just get way too comfy
I don't get rusty, trust me, I don't get rusty, if you wanna see me rust, please
You'll have to 1v1 me: pog, don't try sneak diss me though
I'm way too jumpy, I get more nice when I get grumpy: God

Everybody's way too hostile, in a modern life like Rocko
You want the bottom line, now your arse got a barcode in the bathtub with a mask and a bathrobe
Nowadays, we play the game too hard mode, nowadays, we play the game too Dark Souls
All up in your timeline like Donnie Darko, let me be frank, little bunny, I'm an arsehole
I'ma send shots till the bars closed (Bang), I gotta punch line for your system
Not the kind that you sniffed up when you punch lines like a fist bump for your nostrils
You're not woke, you're just on coke, I'm not a narco, but I'm narcoleptic
Walk around in the same dream that I slept in, don't wake me up, I'm way too hectic