Swanky Al

(album: Uncertain Joys - 2023)

So Swanky Al never fails at fixing his hair
And when he's busy plucking strings he'll stop and give you the stare
It softly, softly rolls from underneath his beetling brow
He's a very English cowboy, see him strutting through town

Take a leaf out of his book, it's such a glittering story
It's clear he's got an ear for Bowie's Hunky Dory
Who doesn't? I guess you take the good with the bad
Who cares when a leather jacket looks as good as that

Making trouble, giving the finger, having a fling
Rolling out the club, entourage in tow
God, you're cool, you are the singer, you've got the charm
It's a pleasure, sir, your company to know

Oh, look, he smokes, takes a toke, cracks a genius joke
It's been obvious for years Homme's his favourite bloke
And when he swings round his guitar and points the finger at you
And croons the often-quoted lyric from the number-one tune
You turn to jelly (So do I), he's The Untouchable Guy
Making tax-avoidance sound like it's a valid past-time
Oh, how we scream, how we beg, Swanky Al nods his head
It's that time, grab the wine, rock'n'roll isn't dead

Making trouble, giving the finger, having a fling
Rolling out the club, entourage in tow
God, you're cool, you are the singer, you've got the charm
It's a pleasure, sir, your company to know

Now here comes Matty in a paddy, he's got two famous folks
Never question his success, it's because he's so woke
He has a Twitter conversation with a mate at the paper
It's up online in minutes (Middle-class is her flavour)
His claim is that his four boys are the band of the decade
Don't piss in my champagne flute and smile and tell me it's Moet
I must admit, those leather slacks you wear are the bomb
Who else'll rock that look now Michael Hutchence is gone?

Making trouble, giving the finger, having a fling
Rolling out the club, entourage in tow
God, you're cool, you are the singer, you've got the charm
It's a pleasure, sir, your company to know
Causing scenes, always delivering, you're set apart
Crooning us all into a bliss
We do believe you leave us simmering, you are the star
Maybeline were wrong, you're surely born with 'it'

You're the star! Yes, you are!
You're the star! Oh, yes you are!