Good Friday

(album: Alopecia - 2008)

If you grew up with white boys
Who only look at black and Puerto Rican porno
Cause they want something that their dad don't got
Then you know where you're at
Mortaring your ear holes shut
In a rush with wet coke
In a Starbucks bathroom with the door closed
On booze some left in residue and confused
Like the first time you used soft water
Down on my luck caught unaware
Like Houdini when the last fist struck

Sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am
If I'm sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am
If I'm sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am

Sucking dick for drink tickets
At the free bar at my cousin's Bat Mitzvah
Cutting the punchline and it ain't no joke
Devoid of all hope circus mirrors and pot smoke
Picking fights on dyke night with shirleys and loccs
And snatching purses
Doing Elton at karaoke and forgettin all the verses
Blowing kisses to disinterested bitches
Playing lead lay in a bad way on Broadway
Sending sexy SMSes to my ex's new man
Cause I can
On the road trying to break an old van
Eating pussy for new fans I am
What the hell
Using Purell til my hands bleed and swell
Missing Mel at a motel 6 I'm unwell if

Sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am
If I'm sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am
If I'm sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am

Feels exciting touching your handwriting
Getting horny by reading it and repeating "poor me"
Intently staring at the picture of your feet on the sticker
At the R. Crumb exhibit
I wonder who's sicker
Jerking off in an art museum john til my dick hurts
The kind of shit I won't admit to my headshrinker
Not even in a whisper to my own little sister
I just act like a dick and talk shit when I'm with her
Aught Six
I say the Friday before Easter was not good
I cried to myself in the pisser
And with you in the front row of the Silver Jews show
You may act like you didn't notice
My fear of the bear at Showbiz Pizza when I was six
Was overwhelming and not dissimilar to this

Sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am
If I'm sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am
If I'm sinking in laughing at something sunken in I am

At Jacob Hand's on tour
I wake up hungover on a hardwood floor
From a dream about your dress
Hangs off of your little breasts
I'd rather be dead
Than call this song "How I Lost Your Respect"
But God bless or get neglected
(God bless or get neglected, God bless or get neglected)
And I'll see you when the sun sets east
Don't forget me