Stay Loose

(album: Dear Catastrophe Waitress - 2003)

I was choking on a cornflake
You said "Have some toast instead"
I was sleeping maybe three hours
You said "You should get to bed"
I was waiting at the church door
For the minister to show
I was looking at the new year
You said "Walk before you crawl"

I was feeling like a loser
You said "Hey, you've still got me"
I was feeling pretty lonely
You said "You wanted to be free"
I was looking for a good time
You said "Let the good times start"
With a quiver of your eyelid
You took on someone else's part

Maybe I'm a little greedy
You said "Think before you speak"
Sometimes I'm a little seedy
You said "Everyone is weak"
Now I feel a little better
Is there something I can do?
But I never heard the answer
I never had a clue

But what about me
I don't really see
How things will improve
If all you want is to stay loose

There's a little echo calling
Like a miner trapped inside
If I tell her of this moment
She will in me doubts confide
And she's on me like a blanket
Like a stalk of wilting grass
I'm not sure about her motives
I'm not sure about her past

But my faith is like a bullet
My belief is like a bolt
The only thing that lets me sleep at night
A little carriage of the soul
If it starts a little bleaker
Then the year may yet be gold
Happiness is not for keeping
Happiness is not my goal

But what about me
I don't really see
How things will improve
If all you want is to stay loose
But what about them
You play mother hen
To a gaggle of gangling youth
All you want is to stay loose

I was living through the seconds
My composure was a mess
I was miles from tenderness
It was dark outside, the day it was lying in pieces
Everything is flat and dreary
I couldn't care what's in the news
Television is the blues
Television is hysterical laughter of people

And I know it could be me
I'm always asking for more
I keep running round in circles
I keep looking for a doorway
I'm going to need two lives
To follow the paths I've been taking