If I Were Rock & Roll

(album: I Hate Cowboys & All Dogs Go To Hell - 2023)

If I were a NASCAR man going 'round and 'round
Yeah, you know I'd be number three
If I were the best damn football in the south
I'd be the SEC
And if I were a Velcro stitched up stars and stripes
You can bet I'd be flying proud
Pressed on the chest of America's best
Putting bad dudes in the ground

And if I were rock 'n' roll
I'd be a middle finger in your face
If I were a lost soul
I'd be in church more than just Sundays
And if for some reason I was Jesus
I'd have a lot of forgiving to do
And if I weren't a fool
Girl, I'd still be with you

If I were a granddaddy rocking on a rocking chair
I'd have a grandson on my lap
If I were a first time there, front-porch stare
I'd pray she kissed me back
And if I were a rebel kid meeting with the man
Hearing Johnny Don't Do That
With a guitar strapped, I'd go all black
Tell 'em all to kiss my

If I were rock 'n' roll
I'd be a middle finger in your face
If I were a lost soul
I'd be in church more than just Sundays
And if for some reason I was Jesus
I'd have a lot of forgiving to do
And if I weren't a fool
Girl, I'd still be with you
Yeah, I'd still be with you

If I were a smart man
I wouldn't just write you a song
Straight from the heart and
And pray you turned it on
No, I'd step it up and I'd mean it
When I look into your eyes
And I'd be on my way to Baton Rouge
And I'd be holding you tonight

And if I were rock 'n' roll
I'd be a middle finger in your face
If I were a lost soul
I'd be in church more than just Sundays
And if for some reason I was Jesus
I'd have a lot of forgiving to do
And if I weren't a fool
Girl, I'd still be with you

Yeah, I'd still be with you
Oh, I'd still be, oh, I'd still be with you

Yeah, I'd still be with you
I'd still be with you