Discourse Between A Man And His Soul

(album: Existence Is Futile - 2021)

I look back on the books of my life I've written so well
Father I fell
Farther I fell
For coveted girls and the sins that follow them
I have loved and laughed enough for half a battalion of foes
But nobody knows of my inner demeanour but thee

Nightmares
Slink in their dark lairs
Thinking of plots where
Everything rings with the sting of depravity
As thou have seen I have not always danced on the edge of the world
I have oft lost my mind
In labyrinths, blind
And broken my bread with the flies

I just don't want to die
Without thee by my side
Sated and beautiful
I will struggle with keys at the gate
Never a saint, far from decency's grace
True to my heart
Bearing off-the-chart latitudes

Father I fell
Farther I fell
A reckless Rakehell with misdeeds that still honour me
I see now that beauty held me mesmerised under a spell
Father I fell
Farther I fell
Down slick mythic wells
Where emptiness swallowed me

I have lived and gasped enough
For more than ten thousand shadows
But nobody knows of my innermost demons but thee

Nightmares
Slink in their dark lairs
Eyes are aflame there
Waiting to sink their despicable teeth into me
As thou have seen I have not always danced on the edge of the world
I have succoured and fought
Like a fucker for naught
But the right to be left to my dreams

Finally soul I am free
Joyously thralled to recalled memories of yore
So before I pass I must see thee if only once more
Oh my beautiful friend
I will love thee until the end is nigh
And in time
I'll find thee in my arms on the vast other side
Father I fell
I look back on the books of my life
I've written so well
Father I fell
Farther I fell, a reckless Rakehell
With misdeeds that still honour me
I see now that beauty held me mesmerised under a spell
Father I fell
Farther I fell, down slick mythic wells
Where emptiness swallowed me