Silence

(album: The Place I Feel Safest - 2017)

I start to feel the weight of everything beneath me
It seems like day to day I wait
waiting for the next mistake to blow back up in my face
What makes you think I'm not living up?
Cause for everything I do, I feel nothing but unloved
Sometimes I feel like it's just never enough, never enough

My hands just freeze; shake the snow from the trees
Don't build this up unless you're planning to landslide into me
I never saw this coming, I'll take my chances in running, I
don't need tension for release

The next time I put myself here, pull me out from the rut
Because I don't think I can take more of this
pushing constantly until my last breath
There's no time to find myself, not a second of air
there's not a moment to spare, and I'm screaming out my lungs
screaming out but no one's there

Callous, careless
How did you miss the fists of tyrants
hiding in the shadows of spineless giants?
It feels so out of reach
Jealous, sightless
How many times will you die
before your death in your head, this is
Lifeless, defiance
I fear a life left incomplete

As time moves so steadily, it's making a fool out of me
I'm done depending
I'm on my own now, I am on my own
I can't be disappointed, I'm expecting gold from a stone
I'm on my own now, I am on my own
I can't have faith in you
It's getting old

We're just a step away from drowning in our dreams
I can't think of the last time that we were steady
I don't like where our path is heading
but if this is forever, I'll take it right into my grave

The next time I put myself here
pull me out from the rut
Because I don't think I can take more of this
pushing constantly until my last breath
There's no time to find myself, not a second of air
there's not a moment to spare, and I'm screaming out my lungs
screaming out but no one's there

I try so hard to make these parallels meet
the illusion of control always follows me
I'm holding onto dreams, the patience I had is gone
I'm just so sick of second chances
If you can't keep up, fuck you I'm moving on
Because I can't keep thinking about what's going on in your head
Sick of you not seeing where I'm coming from
And I bet when I'm gone, you won't have anyone
There's nothing wrong with getting sick of being stepped on
And I bet if I found a way out, you'd fall right to the ground