You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch

(album: Home For The Holidays - 2014)

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch
You really are a heel
You're as cuddly as a cactus
You're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch
You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel!

You're a monster, Mr. Grinch
Your heart's an empty hole
Your brain is full of spiders
You've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch
I wouldn't touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!

You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch
You have termites in your smile
You have all the tender sweetness
Of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch
Given the choice between the two of you
I'd take the seasick crocodile!

You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch
You're a nasty wasty skunk
Your heart is full of unwashed socks
Your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch
The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote
"Stink, stank, stunk!"

You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch
You're the king of sinful sots
Your heart's a dead tomato
Splotched with moldy purple spots, Mr. Grinch
Your soul is an appalling dump heap
Overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable
Mangled up in tangled up knots!

You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch
With a nauseous super "naus"
You're a crooked dirty jockey
And you drive a crooked horse, Mr. Grinch
You're a three-decker sauerkraut
And toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce!