Survive

(album: No Bouquet - 2018)

You woke me up to talk ninety words out loud
My heart raced through the hall at 3:00
And I can't sleep at all
So I think about the small detail
Of everything I cannot actually change

You keep me awake
Counting my age
What are you saying?
You're counting the days
Lines on my face
Why are you staying?

I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
And I've never not survived
We're pretty sure that I'm dying
We're pretty sure that I'm dying
We're pretty sure that I'm dying
And I've never not survived

My chest pulled tight enough to choke me out of light
I haven't been outside in weeks
I'm not missing out cause
I'm awake for every inside joke
I'd rather not have known if I could sleep

But you keep me awake
Counting my age
What are you saying?
You're counting the days
The lines on my face
Why are you staying?

Surely it's normal but I'm unprepared
As all of my functions are under repair
Showing your colleagues how well you can act
But to breathe in the dark is just too much to ask

I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
It's everyday
I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
It's everyday
I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
It's everyday since I got here

I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
I'm pretty sure that I'm dying
And I've never not survived
We're pretty sure that I'm dying
We're pretty sure that I'm dying
We're pretty sure that I'm dying
And I've never not survived

You bad fever
You steal all my water
Garden variety
Cancer of the home
Unremarkable demon
Average low light ceiling
Conditional love
Excusable behavior
You bad believer
You turn me into boredom
A quiet lobby
You're why I work from home.