Always Searching

(album: Radiant Dark - 2020)

Why the fuck do I feel this way?
Always searching for the words to say
Cursed thoughts day after day
Is it me, am I going insane?
Darkness closes in
I'm losing hope, I feel it within
Darkness breathes down my neck
I'm losing hope, no way to cope

Who am I running from?
I'm scared to do this on my own
Worn down and losing ground
I'm lost and can't be found
Tossing, turning, back and forth
I don't know who I am anymore
This was always meant to be
And I will never feel free
I will never feel free

Fuck, what is real?
Don't tell me how to feel
How can I deal?
Just tell me how to heal, yeah
Fuck, what is real?
How can I deal?
Just tell me how to heal

Who am I running from?
I can't do this alone

Who am I running from?
I'm scared to do this on my own
Worn down and losing ground
I'm lost and can't be found
Tossing, turning, back and forth
I don't know who I am anymore
This was always meant to be
And I will never feel free

Going through the motions
I've never felt so dead
The world will never miss me
Always one step ahead
Clouded judgement resides within
Not even half the man I should have been
There is no point in living a lie
My beating heart, just let it die
Just let it die

Who am I running from?
I'm scared to do this on my own
Worn down and losing ground
I'm lost and can't be found
Tossing, turning, back and forth
I don't know who I am anymore
This was always meant to be
And I will never feel free
I will never feel free
What, what?