Don't Look Down

(album: Forgive Me For My Honesty - 2017)

I'm scared I'm wasting my time
Scared I'm losing control of my life
I'm scared of commitment of calling anything mine
I would be lying if I told you, "I'm fine"
Serving these tables to put some food in my stomach
I'm tired of seeing my mom and say "Don't worry, it's coming"
My heart is racing, I'm running to anything more than nothing
Drowning in debt and I'm trying to pull us above it
Tell me everything will be okay
Tell me why does everybody got to fade away
Am I crossing your mind? 'Cause you been all up in mine
But if I saw you, I don't know what I would say
Instead of being together, I need to get it together
Instead of writing these letters, I want to live to remember
Am I better from the past? Yeah, I wonder what I'll know
Haunted by a dream is when you really let it go
I guess things happen for a reason
But I'ma never leave anything at chance
At first glance I'm looking for God's hands
The Devil's looking at me like, "Homie, come dance"
My grandma's getting sicker, I'm never there when I can be
See, my brother feeling lost, I guess it runs in the family
People telling me this music should be a plan B
How could you judge me if you don't understand me?
No breaks, one-twenty going in
Destiny's calling, I'm like, "Baby, come on in"
Right now it feels like do-or-die, everyday it's, "Who am I?"
You call it nine-to-five, man, I call it suicide
I see what they can't see, this is all that I can be
Rather be homeless and broke than be labeled as "happy"
They don't understand me, 'cause no one can stand me
It's always the outsiders who end up outstanding

I lost a hundred dollars on a bet
It's not a lot of money, but it said a lot about me
In the moment, guess I didn't understand it
When nothing is certain, don't ever take it for granted
Pride is a poison that infested our planet
Greed is okay, well, that's the way that they brand it
Our view of everything is such a mess
Having less than we deserve is our perception of happiness
What am I supposed to do?
They say, "Follow the steps, stick to the guidelines"
If I listen to that, I'm just a kid on the sideline
What's in your eyes? I don't care 'bout your eyeline
Never cared about all of that
Money got people snapping for their quarter back
If I get it, I'ma give it back
I feel like happiness is something everybody should have

But we are who we are
I've been lost in the dark, while I've been shooting for stars
Looking for love, like is it really that hard?
Or just have someone who's there when it's all falling apart
But every scar only makes your heart stronger
Hold on, just fight a little longer
I ponder these lines while mopping floors every night
That's when you feel the fatigue and all your hunger
It's been killing me, keep going what they're telling me
More regrets than memories, sometimes you gotta let it be
The past ain't ahead of me, I got to give my best
How do I make change if I don't give you my two cents?
I look around, I see the dying of youth
While you're picking up a bottle, let me pour you the truth
I used to be like all of you, like you got nothing to lose
Nobody want a commitment when everybody's been used
Step in my conscience, my heart is the pilot
The past is behind you, but lately I've been behind it
I'm finding I've been placed in happiness in people who leave
And they love it when you're broken, hate you when you achieve
It's like I can never be me, the world is just a routine
Telling you how to live and the certain value it brings
Like rings, summer flings, things ain't what they seem
So, don't you ever buy the happiness they sell on the screen
'Cause happiness ain't a store bought can
And love isn't found in just a one-night dance
I'm looking at the sky like, "Give me one more chance"
I'm tired of sitting in my room like I know I can
Nothing's done until you do it, just look at what I'm pursuing
To die like what you're doing, my girl is 'cause of my music
It was lose her or lose it, my heart's in the music
If I didn't, I'd be dead, so I went and I choose it
Trying to figure it out, and this ain't even about us
I'm trying to be something more, so that my kids can be proud of
I'm trying to show everybody there's not much worth in these dollars
Out here making a difference, don't you give up
Every line that I'm writing is just for you to get up
Love is barely an offer, yeah, we don't give it enough
Man, what's the point of the top if nobody wants to look up?

So, look up, look up
Don't look down
Look up, look up
Don't look down
Don't look down