Old Man Jones

(album: America's Favorite Pastime - 2012)

I'd sit in that old barber chair
And old man Jones would buzz my hair
Wish I had a dime for the time he spent
Giving daddy his two cents

Spare the rod, spoil the child
Give an inch and they'll take a mile
Love 'em tough, even when it hurts
Might hate ya now, but man it's worth the fight
To keep the girls off the pole, and the boys off the pipe

He said Daddy worked himself to death
And Mama had no iron fist
Me and Sis got on a terror
Mama didn't stand a prayer

Spare the rod, spoil the child
Give an inch and they'll take a mile
Love 'em tough, even when it hurts
Might hate ya now, but man it's worth the fight
To keep the girls off the pole, and the boys off the pipe

I got lost, I found drugs
Hanging out with thieves and thugs
Sister didn't know no shame
Trixie was her midnight name

Spare the rod, spoil the child
Give an inch and they'll take a mile
Love 'em tough, even when it hurts
Might hate ya now, but man it's worth the fight
To keep the girls off the pole, and the boys off the pipe

I saw last night on CNN
Cops were at some school again
Wish that old man Jones was here
To sit the whole damn world down in his chair