10K Problems

Niggas asking where I been at, I gotta recap it
Relapsing D.R.U.G. habits
Tryna move forward, depression been holding me backwards
Recovery ain't a straight line
What's going on like Marvin is
I heard through the grapevine that I'm falling off
I been on another planet, over they head with the last album still they didn't understand it
Now I'm in a panic, scrambling for relevance from a bunch of people that I consider irrelevant
The elephant in the room, is the music coming soon?
If it gets you on will you jive, will you coon?
Now I'm on 10 in this 4 corner room, dead inside like a baby that's aborted in the womb
Overpressured and undervalued, I'm never enough
I got a complex in believing I'm a fuck up
Then I got Complex feeding my demons and they read it and validate the reasons that I don't love us
I left my woman cause I couldn't keep this shit at home
You can't be good with someone else if you ain't good alone
See every girl that try to do me right, I did them wrong
But even dogs get tired of chasing a bone
I lash out with violence and deal with the karma
I broke a bottle on a nigga head out in Toronto then got extorted for $10,000
Honestly that was the least of my 10,000 problems
My pops had a surgery on his neck and was paralyzed, It's a painful process watching your parents die
And niggas look at my life and think I'm in paradise, don't know the blood I spilled over these parasites
Shit is deeper than rap nigga, my right hand scammed me then framed the homie like a class picture
So I went and thrashed niggas then that nigga twin brother called his brothers tryna come and clap niggas
So I'm riding round with the strap nigga
Beverley Hills police pulling up on me cause I'm a black nigga
Now I got this gun case, facing 1-5, a lawyer's fees can't pay my mama not to cry
Surrounded by homicide, I got survivor's guilt
Wishing maybe I'd be better off if I got killed, wishing planes that I'm on would crash
First class flight to an early grave, I'll be home at last
I'd just look at the microphone and laugh, would I have ever picked you up if I knew what I know in the past
Summer skies all overcast, if I don't make it to tomorrow then play this verse on my behalf
I told my whole heart