Gay Robot

(album: Shhh...Don't Tell - 2004)

Pass the fuckin ball!

What an idiot!

Fuck it, I'm gonna go get another beer. You guys want one?

Alright...

Two Please!

Oh boy...

Hahahaha

[phone rings]

Hello?... Yeah, yeah, cool, we're all just hangin out... Alright
Bye-bye...

Who was that, some chicks?

Nah, it was my neighbor, his robot's comin over

What?

Yeah, he built a robot a while ago and the robot came out gay

Yo, we're out of Hunnyduffers so I grabbed a couple of Gooseheads...

Okay, that's cool...

Wait, so the robot's gay?

Gay Robot's comin over?

Yep...

Oh, dude, you gotta see this, he's insane with football stats

No way!

[doorbell rings]

It's open!

Hey guys... what's up?

Hey, good to see ya Gay Robot...

Gay Robot in the house!

Word up... what's the score, fuckers?

Giants are eatin shit in the third quarter, it's 24-8 Miami...

Don't worry, the Giants have phenominal fourth quarter numbers...

Really?

They'll come back and win by three

Alright!

I love it!

Fuck you guys!

Sorry, buddy...

Who's the new guy?

Oh, that's my friend John.

Hey John... sweet hat!

Uh... thanks... what's goin on?

You know... just chillin... can I suck your dick?

What?

No, no, no, no, he's okay, Gay Robot...

That was funny...

The Gay Robot gets a little horny cause he doesn't know any
gay guys around here...

Oh, I see...

Sorry!

hehehe...

Oh, I can't believe you dropped that! Do something, Henderson,
you fat fuck!

Hey! That was very offensive to me!

Why? You're not fat...

I thought you said fag!

No, i wouldn't say that, I said fat...

Oh, sorry!

hahaha

I guess if you fist fuck me, we'll be even!

No, I'm not gay, Gay Robot...

I thought you said you were?

No... You know I never said that...

I know, I was just rousing you! Good times! Good times guys!

Hahahaha

Hey, Gay Robot's havin a good time!

So how do you think the Eagles are gonna do this season, Gay Robot?

Let's find out! [whirring, beeping noises] Says here, due to injuries
and irratic weather patterns, the Eagles will finish a dismal 7-9

What? No way!

Deal with it

The Gay Robot knows his shit, man

Now will someone blow it on my face?

Nobody's gay here but you, Gay Robot, so let's just watch some
football, alright?

Look, I'm not here to bring the party down... It's just... I run
on semen... Without it, I could die... Help me to live fellas...
Jerk off in my mouth immediatly... Please, my circuits are
shorting... Starting to fade already... See a light... Going
towards it....

hahahahah

You're makin this up, Gay Robot!

My bad! You got me! Hahaha... good times!

Hahaahaha...

So does he eat food like us... human people?

Yeah, he can eat food...

Ya want some tortilla chips, Gay Robot?

Sounds great, John. Can I dip them in your ass?

Ooh...

I'm all set, thanks

Hehehe...

What the fuck?! The reception's all fuzzy!

Are you kidding me?

Don't panic... I can fix it

Oh hey! That's right! I love it, work your robot magic, fix that shit!

Okay, here's the problem!

My man! What is it?

Your cock's not in my asshole!

Aww.... Maybe you should go home and take a cold shower, Gay Robot...

Alright... I'll go... We'll just whack each other off and I'll bail

Not gonna happen

Please?

Goodbye

Fuck you

Later Gay Robot

[fly unzips]

Oh no! Look what happened! My robo-cock fell out of my pants!

Oh, shit, he's got a boner!!

Taste it!!!

[spraying sounds]

Oh, oh!!!

Fuckin asshole!!!

Come on, Gay Robot!!!

Aww, man!

Later fags!

[Door opens and closes]

[Distant voices]

Hey Gay Robot

Hey Mr. Chasen... Can I suck your dick?