Mr. Grinch

(album: A Very P86 Christmas - 2015)

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch
You really are a heel
You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch
You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel!

You're a monster, Mr. Grinch
Your heart's an empty hole
Your brain is full of spiders, you have garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch
I wouldn't touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!

You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch
You have termites in your smile
You have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch
Given a choice between the two of you I'd take the seasick crocodile!

You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch
You're a nasty wasty skunk
Your heart is full of unwashed socks, your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch
The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote
"Stink, stank, stunk"!

You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch
You're the king of sinful sots
Your heart's a dead tomato splotched with moldy purple spots, Mr. Grinch
Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful
Assortment of rubbish imaginable mangled up in tangled up knots!

You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch
With a nauseous super "naus"!
You're a crooked dirty jockey and you drive a crooked hoss, Mr. Grinch
You're a three decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce!