Reflection

(album: Still Lost - 2017)

The reflection of my face, some wouldn't even recognize
Or who put me in this place, I wouldn't even recognize
Time has been so cruel, I could've blamed me but I blame you
I do...

Lately I feel lost, tell me if you find me
It's hard to put the past behind me
When my mind just sits there and keeps reminding
Me of all the bullshit that I kept inside me

I'm not lying when I tell you I feel like I'm lost
It just feels like I trapped in my thoughts
I just sit there and think, and I think, and I think
And I think and I think, I lost it all

I am at home, I got back against the wall
I feel hella alone I got no one to call
And I'm still on my own because no ones involved
Tell me where do I go when everything falls

Damn... I guess that's why I'm making this song...
I just sit and reflect on every single thing that went wrong...

My best friend, he turned out to be a fake
The real definition of becoming a snake
And I lost my girl to and that was my mistake
I put music above her and it took her place

And she's the one I love and my heart it just breaks
Because now I'm alone, there's no girl to replace
See I tried to re-date, but it's always a waste
Ever since she left nothing's ever been the same

Lately it feels like I just been wilding out
There to many things that I'm finding out
And my passion has been slowly dying out
And I'm still in a whole and Climbing out

Just to stumble over, but I'm trying out
Lost my composure, so I write it out
I'm feeling depressed and I'm hiding out
I think that's why I'm crying out, That

The reflection of my face, some wouldn't even recognize
Or who put me in this place, I wouldn't even recognize
Time has been so cruel, I could've blamed me but I blame you
I do...

I guess I'm to blame, can't lie to me
Walk in the room and they start eyeing me
Feeling overwhelmed with my anxiety
So I stay to myself and I overthink quietly

I stare in the mirror and I vent there alone...
You say you been there when I'm on my own
You say you'll be there when I know you won't
And you say you love me when I know you don't!

I swear this depression isn't a muthafuckin joke!
Anxiety to I deal with them both
I been loosing faith and my hope
Still haven't found a way I can cope

Yeah... I think loving myself is the very thing that I need to do most...
Cause... I lost everyone else that I thought I would always keep close...

And to think, I gave you all that I can
You took advantage of me and then ran
I made you who you are now I ask
Why would you flip on me I don't understand

Told myself never again, never reach out for a hand
Never put trust in a friend, never give up where you stand
I gave everybody a chance just to see we didn't last

Nothing that I been doing has been I panning out
I'm suffering and you stand around
And falling so fucking hard I could smash the ground
Wishing that I could have my mom and dad around

Anxiety got the best of me and I'm spazzing out
Exhausted so much I feel like just passing out
I wanted fame, you can have it now...
Because I ain't the same you can ask around... kuz

The reflection of my face, some wouldn't even recognize
Or who put me in this place, I wouldn't even recognize
Time has been so cruel, I could've blamed me but I blame you
I do...