Alive

(album: Some Love Lost - 2014)

SL
Parks on the board
Real niggas in the booth, let's go
I got Kdot on the keys
It go (it go)
Check this, listen

I got strangers in my face
Begging me to take a picture
Still self-centered, they can give a fuck 'bout how a nigga feel
Bitches hang around to hang around even when shit get real
But I ain't left nothing, maybe I should write a different will
They using me I'm using them, they don't see the angle
Therapeutic, I don't even fuck 'em unless it's painful
Why do all these bitches seem to think they can change Joe?
Judge me all you want I never claim to be an angel
Patriotic, psychotic, obsessive-compulsive, convulsive, neurotic
On narcotics, searching for you if you got it
Seeing young blacks getting killed weekly that's a moot fact
If these coppers shoot at me, trust me I'mma shoot back
Maybe y'all 'll pray for me
But I don't mean once or even twice, I mean every day for me
So I'm on my knees, there's gotta be a better way for me
Open these windows and these doors but demons stay with me
And baby that's okay with me

[Hook:]
I came in with my heart, what made you wanna leave?
Fuck with my heart and now it's killing me
This be enough to make a nigga cry
I wish 'em well until this running dry
They won't ever take me alive
All I ever do is survive
And I know cause they already tried
It's too late cause I've already died
At least inside, they'll never take me alive

Lemme get far as fuck away from these niggas
Fuck away from these hoes
Where I'm at now its fuck music I don't wanna rap
I don't wanna perform or host
And my father's saying "get it together" and nothing matters but my health
Hope heaven reserved a section for an addict like myself
Watching myself on TV see my knees shaking on that show
Plus the way shorty's life is now, I bet she's rethinking that "no"
She thought she was only saying no to marriage
But that "no" is to so much more, now I can't wait to see what her path is
I guess being a wife ain't sound as fun as being a bad bitch
Couldn't deal with my habits, wasn't me though you'd been catfish
We're speaking a different language
Showing you the signs in morse code
Last time a nigga loved two bitches I lost 'em both
So she scared, try not to get emotionally invested
I know God will find a way for those emotions to get tested
Which is cool, maybe not for me
Front all you want in your heart somewhere
I know there's a spot for me
The sad part is when it's vacant, I'll be gone
How I love you but I hate you
And all you're doing is being the person that I made you
From hateful to graceful
From rageful to grateful
Then God came and snatched that space for you
I tried to save it boo
Everything I caught myself building to that point was made for two
Writing out the script, wish you'd a told me the page was full
But fuck it, He knows better than I
Regret'll subside, let's sever the ties
After all it's just one less goodbye

[Hook]

Lemme get far as fuck away from these bitches
Fuck away from these hoes
Lemme get far as fuck away from my niggas
Lemme get real close to my foes
They telling me that I gotta act famous now, etcetera
I been regular, so I feel like an anus now
See all of this time I've just been treating y'all accordingly
On an even plane like no one is any less or more than me
But the Lord agrees he said, "keep playing with fire, if you're Joseph you'll get burned"
I hate second guessing I'll wait 'til the motives get confirmed
[?]
Call from the shorty, we off that bitch, option time
Models, sport some
All these cities, I got to tour one
All these bottles, I got to pour one
All these hoes, i got to call one
Our situation is a tall one, what you gonna do, pour or run?
So I'm spending forty thousand dollars on a time-piece
Help my self esteem and get this shit up off my mind please
Anybody looking for me, y'all know where to find me
I be right up Steinway nigga I ain't playing hide and seek
Let that liquor induce ya, then watch how fast it go from a couple niggas on the hookah
To some triggers, to them shooters, everything that's going on is kinda sicker than I'm used to
I'm just wrestling with them snakes, you ever kick it with Medusa?
Let me get the fuck away from these pills
The fuck away from this drinking
Let me get the fuck away outta my way
Let me get far as fuck away from my thinking
'Till it's better, it's whatever, shit I'm unapologetic
Since all i got is my word nigga tell 'em that i said it
It's Joe

[Hook]

Uhh, uhh, uhh
It go

[Hook]