If It Ain't One Thing It's Annuddah (Bruddah)

(album: On And On - 1989)

[Prince Markie Dee:]
Man, all these problems in our world today
I just don't know what to do, man

If it ain't one thing, it's another
Sell a million copies? They put me on a magazine cover
I sell one or two, they claim that I'm played out
My girl nags me at home, so, I shoulda stayed out
I buy a new car, it runs out of gas
In school, I was always getting kicked out of class
Mom would say, "Be like your older brother!"
If it ain't one thing it's another

You know what I'm saying man?
I mean, all these problems
Let me tell ya 'bout the time when I Well, let me break it down for ya

Picked up my date at eight in a happy mood
Drove to City Island for some seafood
$3.99 for all you can eat
Shrimp galore, bon apetit
We ate hearty 'till we couldn't eat
Went to the Marriott, paid for a suite
She was anxious even more that me
And, man, I got busy as a bumblebee
When we were done, I drove her home
Proceeded to my house, all alone
It started raining, I was playing Bobby Brown
I missed my exit, so, I circled around
And that's when it happened, I didn't get far
A pole jumped in front of my car
I broke my leg, man, do I stutter?
If it ain't one thing, it's anuddah, bruddah

[Kool Rock Ski:]
On tour for so long that it wears me down
I've been to every city and every small town
And, after a while, things start to ache
I want my body to move, that d-mn thing won't shake
Then, one night, the last date on tour
From that morning my throat was sore
I started getting worried, it wound't be long
'Cause the way my throat was hurting, it would soon be gone
Then, wouldn't you know? You know it, yes
I tried to say somthing but I was voiceless
Showtime came, I had to lip-synch
It got so wild that I couldn't think
The show was done, a doctor checked my health
I spent the night all by myself
Man, what a bummer, what did I stutter?
If it ain't one thing, it's anuddah, bruddah