Video Blues

(album: Major Moves - 1984)

Well the latest craze going around
Is called the video cassete recorder.
And I was the first one in my town
To send off my money order.
Well I thought that thing would never get here
But old UPS came through.
I ripped the box apart and bless their hearts
They sent a free movie too.
Well I hooked it up once
And I hooked it up twice and 8 or 9 more times.
I had it all wrong but I finally got it right,
Just play, stop, rewind.
I grabbed the movie they sent and I shoved it right in
It was called The X-Rated Reviews.
Now, I seen movies where folks kiss
But I never seen nothing like this.
Oh Lord, I got the video blues.

Well I drove downtown to join the tape club
And friends I've got some news.
Most all the movies they had down there
Was just like they one they sent me too.
I bought Star Wars, Jaws, Poltergeist, Superman 1 and 2.
When they added it up I'd spent three hundred bucks.
I got the video blues.

I got the video blues, don't know what to do.
This could get expensive.
I want a camera to zoom, remote control too,
So I can make documentaries.
Now they're trying to pass laws about copyrights and all
And taping things off of the tube.
I'd probably be better off if they's haul this thing off,
'Cause I've got the video blues.

Well I called my girl to come on over
'Cause I had new movies to show.
I started her off with Smokey And The Bandit
I thought I'd kind of take it slow.
But later that night when the time was right
I showed one called Sweedish Ways.
She said, "Well, I've never in my life..
Well, I guess it's alright...
Hey! Yeah, go on, let it play!"

I got the video blues, what have I got into?
This thing has taken my place.
She don't wanna hug or make any love.
She just sits there with that funny look on her face.
I came on too strong, I shoulda known all along
What I was getting into.
She won't give me a kiss, 'cause she's afraid she'll miss
Something from the Movies Review.

I've got the video blues, don't know what to do,
And this could get expensive.
I want a camera to zoom, remote control too,
So I can make home documentaries.
Now they're trying to pass laws about copyrights and all
And taping things off of the tube.
I'd probably be better off if they'd haul this thing off
'Cause I got the video blues.
I'd be so much better off if they'd haul this stuff off
'Cause I got the video blues.

Hey baby, it's me. I'm still here.
Hey, look at me!