Breathin' To Death

(album: Rebel - 2008)

It's like I'm tired of life
Lord I'm wrong, why I can't get right?
And when it's dark, why it can't get light?
Why it can't be light?
It's so heavy, why my sin won't let me see the end?
Come get me!
Please come get me!
My thoughts, my mind, my ways all evil
I'm s'posed to be Your people, I'm s'posed to see Your sequel
I said I'd never leave You
But I'm so left, I ain't right
Lord, I'm sleeping with death
Man, I'm cheating with death
Am I deaf? It's like I don't hear You
I say that I'm a Christian, but it's like I don't fear You
I'm on a selfish island and I am nowhere near You
God, I really need You even though I don't appear to
I'm drinking out a broken cistern that could never hold water and I'm gonna get burned
Though I try, I never satisfy to quench this yearn
I hear You calling, but it's like a fight for me to just turn
Lord, I deserve to burn

I'm feeling schizophrenic,
Maybe I ain't saved, 'cause I gotta get high just to block out all the pain
Seen death, seen hurt, seen a whole lot of things
But instead of running from it I'm running away from change
It's like I'm outside in the ice cold weather
The rain's coming down, I keep getting wetter
I know I'm getting sick and I could die any second
But still I refuse to let Your truths make me better
I'd rather eat flies and maggots instead of bread
And it's killing me slow, but I can't get it through my head
You were stabbed, You were murdered
And for me is why You bled
But I spit on your bloody face as if I never cared
Lord, how dare I compare my pain?
Your father turned his back
And You were left to hang
I don't know why You did it, that I can't explain
How can You love this sinner who's desecrated your name?
Lord, I deserve the flames

I know I tell lies
I know I do dirt
Apart from You, I'm nothing, but You can give me worth
I don't know if I know You
But still I know I should
I know these days are evil and only You are good
I've come to this conclusion that I would like to change 'cause all the world's money and fame cannot sustain
I know that I should turn but that's the hardest thing
Cause do I really feel that having Jesus is a gain?
The world is so tempting
Satan is a beast
He hypnotizes my eyes to say the least
But Jesus be my treasure! To know You is to live
And I am here dying, trying everything there is
All I need here is You
Help me turn 'way from sin
Lord, give me grace to turn away and the fear to not give in
I know that I'm not perfect but I could rest in Him
I know I don't deserve it but still I take your hand
Lord, let me take Your hand

Help me Lord before there's no time left
I ain't living I'm just breathing to death [echo]
Your ways are perfect and they lead me to rest
Mine are evil and they lead me to death