Lewis

(альбом: Uke Puke - 2021)

Lewis was an odd boy
Who had no friends at all
He was sickly skinned and tattered clothed
And he wasn't very tall
He walked to school alone
With his lunchbox in his hand
Dreading the ridicule he'd be forced to withstand

The boys at school would tease him
But the most unruly bunch
Would pinch him, poke him, call him names
And even steal his lunch
They would treat him with disdain
Themselves uncouth and crass
But was Lewis all that different from the other kids in class?

While walking home from school Lewis
Noticed a girl
With white skin and pink hair like a cotton candy whirl
Intrigued by her style
And enthralled of her pulchritude
Lewis tried to speak with her but she was quite rude

Disturbed by his presence
The girl walked away
But Lewis stepped behind her while entreating her to stay
Her hair soft and fluffy
Smelled good enough to eat
So Lewis plucked a mouthful and it tasted rather sweet

She'd been waiting for a friend
To take her on a date
Imagine his surprise when he arrived a bit late
Cowering and sobbing
The poor girl was in shock
While Lewis devoured most of her hair
Lock by lock

Now, what happened next is too violent to tell
Let's just say Lewis had an accident and fell
He was left there swollen
And bleeding on the mound
The lesson was taught had been fierce and profound

But the couple's fate was worse
As the two were walking home
A giant furry beast that throughout the night did roam
Ate each child, someone's son and
And someone's daughter
It chewed them both whole and left no
Proof of a slaughter

Lewis is an odd boy, who has no friends at all
But he owns a ferocious beast that's scary and tall
His pet is trained to eat those who aren't very nice
So before you pick on Lewis be sure and think twice