are you okay?

(albüm: Winnetka Bowling League - 2018)

You look older than I remember
And I guess that some of that wear may be my fault
And I can't quite figure out which fight had been our last
Or if that one even mattered much at all
Disillusioned as snow angels who thought their wings were permanent
In seclusion you were faithful or at least hid your finer print
How dumb I was in hindsight to think that I could really know
Much of anything about anything though

And does being in the Los Angeles bring me to mind?
And does wine and Billie Holiday still make you cry?
When you call is it to open up a door to better days?
Or is it simple as the way you wanna say
"Are you okay?"

An empty cup can't fill another
Why did that take us so long to figure out?
There were sides of you where I swore "I could love her"
But to love takes so much more than knowing how
And I'm still in that apartment where we were big kids playing house
Where we bought the cups and curtains to imitate settling down
And I kept some of our pictures and I wear my birthday watch
To remind me of the man I'm glad I'm not

Does your new boyfriend know how much I still mean to you?
Do you change some of the details for a more convenient truth?
Can he translate how you hold his hand into levels of your pain?
Does he know to ask despite what you may say?
Are you okay?

You're a child on an airplane, you fear what's out of your control
And you love New York 'cause it was somewhere else for you to go
And you dyed your hair so you could look your mirror in the eyes
And pretend she's someone you don't recognize

So it's time to lose my number and let the past be where we stay
When you've had too much to drink again someone else can hold your waist
We were never quite as good as how your memory replays
And I don't owe you no answer when you say
"Are you okay?"
"Are you okay? "