Scrooge

When a cold wind blows it chills you, chills you to the bone
But there's nothing in nature that freezes your heart like years of being alone
It paints you with indifference like a lady paints with rouge
And the worst of the worst
The most hated and cursed
Is the one that we call Scrooge

Unkind as any
And the wrath of many
This is Ebenezer Scrooge

Oh, there goes Mr. Humbug, there goes Mr. Grim
If they gave a prize for being mean the winner would be him
Oh, Scroogey loves his money 'cause he thinks it gives him power
If he became a flavour you can bet he would be sour

(Even the vegetables don't like him)

There goes Mr. Skinflint, There goes Mr. Greed
The undisputed master of the underhanded deed
He charges folks a fortune for his dark and drafty houses
As poor folk live in misery
It's even worse for mouses

He must be so lonely, he must be so sad
He goes to extremes to convince us he's bad
He's really a victim of fear and of pride
Look close and there must be a sweet man inside
Naaaah!

There goes Mr. Outrage, there goes Mr. Sneer
He has no time for friends or fun his anger makes that clear
Don't ask him for a favor 'cause his nastiness increases
No crust of bread for those in need
No cheeses for us meeses

There goes Mr. Heartless, there goes Mr. Cruel
He never gives, he only takes, he lets this hunger rule
If being mean's a way of life you practice and rehearse
Then all that work is paying off 'cause Scrooge is getting worse

Every day in every way, Scrooge is getting worse!