Divorce Me C.O.D.

I just bought me a great long ticket
I'm gonna use it at 4 P.M
So you can call your secret love
And break the news to him
Oh, I thought your little romance
Was on the strict Q.T
So if you want your freedom P.D.Q
Divorce me C.O.D

I won't be around
To hear you cry
I'm Texas bound
And by and by
Well, you can reach me down in Dallas
A general delivery
So if you want your freedom P.D.Q
Divorce me C.O.D

There's gonna come a day, gal
When you'll be feeling blue
And you'll find that you can't pay your bills
With a little old I.O.U
Well, this dynamite you're fooling with
May be T.N.T
So if you want your freedom P.D.Q
Divorce me C.O.D

No need to fall
Down on your knees
'Cause I know all
My ABC's
Oh well, I ain't no college 'fessor
I ain't got no P.H.D
So if you want your freedom P.D.Q
Divorce me C.O.D