Pretend Best Friend
(专辑: How To Make Friends And Influence People - 1994)
The
odds have built up of the
chance you're going down, 'Cos you're looking pretty guilty in the
court of the
crown, And my friend's getting eager to complete this mission, It's better all round just to sign the
confession. Doesn't matter if you're innocent or guilty as hell, My friend's got a
feeling that you're feeling unwell, Who cares about the
truth, the
truth's there to bend, Do as I
say I'm your only friend. The
wicked step father that took a
step farther, Played the
patron saint in his shining armour, With his sword of power and shield to protect you, Tongue hanging out 'cos he's going to get you. You know I
want to hug you, you know I
want to kiss you, I't's your dear old pop and you know I
really miss you, In the
pantomime of life look out he's behind you, Says no I'm just here to remind you. Best friend I'm all that you've got, Pretend best friend if you like it or not, Pretend best friend so don't talk to them, You've got to talk to me 'cos I'm your best friend. Call yourself a
friend, That drives me round the
bend, You call me when you like, And call me what you like. Was it the
father or the
son or the
holy ghost, The
butler in the
kitchen or the
gameshow host, The
policeman on the
corner who'll show you the
way, The
geezer with a
beard comes on Xmas day. Could be your mother or your father or your sister or your brother, Doesn't matter who it is they'll say there ain't no other, Might never see 'em or you meet them every day, But who gives a
damn when you hear them say. Best friend I'm all that you've got, Pretend best friend if you like it or not, Pretend best friend so don't talk to them, You've got to talk to me 'cos I'm your best friend.