Uneasy Rider
(专辑: Honey In The Rock - 1973)
I
was takin a
trip out to L.A. Toolin along in my cheverolet Tokin on a
number and diggin on the
radio Just as I
crossed the
Mississippi line I
heard that highway start to whine And I
knew that left rear tire was about to blow Well the
spare was flat and I
got uptight Cause there wasn't a
filling station in sight So I
just limped on down the
shoulder on the
rim I
went as far as I
could and when I
stopped the
car It was right in front of this little bar Kind of a
red-neck lookin joint called the
Dew Drop Inn I
stuffed my hair up under my hat And told the
bartender that I
had a
flat And would he be kind enough to give me change for a
one There was one thing I
was sure proud to see There wasn't a
soul in the
place except for him and me He just looked disgusted and pointed toward the
telephone I
called up the
station down the
road a
ways He said he wasn't very busy today And he could have someone out there in just about 10 minutes or so He said, "Now, you just stay right where yer at!" And I
didn't bother to tell the
darn fool That I
sure as hell didn't have anyplace else to go I
just ordered up a
beer and sat down at the
bar When some guy walked in and said, "Who owns this car With the
peace sign, the
mag wheels and the
four on the
floor?" He looked at me and I
damn near died And I
decided that I'd just wait outside So I
laid a
dollar on the
bar and headed for the
door Just when I
thought I'd get outta there with my skin These 5
big dudes come strollin in With one old drunk chick and some fella with green teeth I
was almost to the
door when the
biggest one Said, "You tip your hat to this lady, son!" And when I
did, all that hair fell out from underneath Now the
last thing I
wanted was to get into a
fight In Jackson Mississippi on a
Saturday night Especially when there was three of them and only one of me They all started laughin and I
felt kinda sick And I
knew I
better think of something pretty quick So I
just reached out and kicked old green teeth right in the
knee Now he let out a
yell that'd curl yer hair But before he could move I
grabbed me a
chair And said "Now watch him Folks cause he's a
thoroughly dangerous man!" "You may not know it but this man is a
spy. He's a
undercover agent for the
FBI And he's been sent down here to infiltrate the
Ku Klux Klan!" He was still bent over holdin on to his knee But everybody else was looking and listening to me And I
laid it on thicker and heavier as I
went I
said, "Would you believe this man has gone as far As tearing Wallace stickers off the
bumpers of cars. And he voted for George McGovern for President." "Well, he's a
friend of them long haired, hippy-type, pinko fags! I
betchya he's even got a
commie flag tacked up on the
wall inside of his garage." "He's a
snake in the
grass, I
tell ya guys. He may look dumb but that's just a
disguise, He's a
mastermind in the
ways of espionage" They all started lookin real suspicious at him And he jumped up and said "Now just wait a
minute Jim! You know he's lying I
been living here all of my life!" "I'm a
faithful follower of Brother John Birch And I
belong to the
Antioch Baptist Church. And I
ain't even got a
garage, you can call home and ask my wife!" Then he started saying somethin bout the
way I
was dressed But I
didn't wait around to hear the
rest I
was too busy moving and hoping I
didn't run outta luck When I
hit the
ground I
was making tracks And they were just taking my car down off the
jacks So I
threw the
man a
twenty and jumped in and fired that mother up Mario Andretti wouldda sure been proud Of the
way I
was movin when I
passed that crowd Coming out the
door and headed toward me at a
trot And I
guess I
should of gone ahead and run But somehow I
just couldn't resist the
fun Of chasing them all just once around the
parking lot Well they headed for their car, but i
hit the
gas And spun around and headed them off at the
pass I
was slinging gravel and putting a
ton of dust in the
air I
had them all out there steppin and fetchin Like their heads was on fire and their asses was catchin then I
figgered I
had better go ahead and split before the
cops got there When I
hit the
road I
was really wheelin Had gravel flyin and rubber squeelin And I
didn't slow down till I
was almost to Arkansas I
think I'm gonna reroute my trip I
wonder if anybody'd think I'd flipped If I
went to L.A., via Omaha