Cold Blooded Christmas
(专辑: You Want Some Of This? - 2009)
It was late at night on christmas eve I
was dreaming of the
soft white snow (white snow) I
was awoken by a
noise near the
christmas tree What it was I
did not know It was santa claus, he was bringing me some gifts Unfortunately I
did not know that (I didn't know) So I
quietly snuck up behind him and I
shot him five times in the
back It went "bow, bow, bow, bow, bow" He said "what the
fuck ow, ow, ow" Then I
shot him three more times in the
head Pieces of his brain flew out and he was dead That's when I
noticed his blood-soaked beard And his red suit filled with bullet holes (oh, oh) I
said "Oh my god, I
killed santa claus I'm not going to jail for this asshole" (Hell no) So I
went do my shed and I
got my saw And I
started to chopedy, chop, chop (chop, chop, chop) I
started with his arms, then his legs, then his head and then the
torso was a
really long job And the
blood went spurt, spurt, spurt It was really hard work, work, work It was hard cutting through his spine I
must have vomited 16 times I
burned all the
pieces in my fireplace The
smell of burning human flesh filled my nose 11 hours later there was nothing left then thats when I
heared my telephone It was aunty Gene looking for uncle Bob She said he left the
house dressed as santa claus But he didn't come home last night "Have you seen him, god I
hope he's allright"