The Nothing
(专辑: The Tingly Circus - 2007)
I
am the
empress My hair is pulled back And I
am childlike And I
am dying Dark Eve bites Adam apple Licks red juices from chin dribble Purple plum and yellow night The
Lord kicking himself all the
while Kicking himself all the
while The
perfume of pagans and angry angels The
scent of her mouth somehow leaked into my winter layers Reeling, still reeling, cries outside the
theater doors Rewinder breaks, remember those clementine oranges Chest roared hoarse (clementine oranges) Peeling ash off a
Camel Light Smoke too many cigarettes in the
back of the
parking lot Never a
word spoken unless from my lips first Reeling, still reeling from today: That hug we made long in the
hallway Was I
made animal? As if slept & awoke Having dreamt human form Became by morn What I
was always Untamed With constant, steady urge to run Hands hold ankles taut Soft while lips and tongue take Breath into lungs Held to hold fork firm to eat from purple street Rain fall and snow melts and everyday a
baby doesn't make it King of owls perches in my chest I
am child, I
did not ask for this But everyday a
baby opens eyes awake from purple street And the
struck match burns at the
point of strike Sharp cut to blue and then the
light Lip of a
window, lip of a
can, lip of a
lover, sea lipped on the
sand I'm a
pale attempt at a
full-limbed lion Were we a
travesty? To love in the
jungle of our hearts Tangled and pulsing Won't you tell me? We could be Adam and Eve again We could take our clothes off right here, right now, eat fruit into the
night Oh we did not frolic like rabbits, we ran like hares chased by hounds Until we tripped and all was lost and our hides Oh, and our hides And from the
darkness erupts a
sound loud as trumpets Hearts rise up in song to the
surface I
dare say, build your love big as skyscrapers I
bowed in her essence and when I
woke I
found my face in my hands Don't hold your dead dog in a
carpet bag You will need your hands to clap And your arms to hug people when they're crying Sobs can be heard from the
highest But don't look up, don't turn around It's unimportant But what grief it is To love someone as your own blood and watch them turn and walk away Too unhappy to cry This pain that decorates my chest, it is heavy as a
piece of furniture That I
must carry It challenges and weakens me and when I
think, my spine might split The
weight is lifted and I'll rest upon it And the
beebuzz will not fail to seduce the
flowers Thus reversing their existence, making mothers out of them I
stand motherless and vertical amongst the
others And there is something like a
needle in our ears But we are not, we are not, we are not, we are not Fearful Fear-ful I
am the
empress My hair is pulled back I
am childlike And I
am dying And my two options Are a
boy who rides a
horse and hunts purple buffalo Or a
child who eats PB&J in an attic And still a
fear of trusting anyone When the
nothing is in my fingertips And when it empties out my heart